The top country-archeology song this week is
“Looking For Nessie in All The Wrong Places” by Kris Kryptologist. At
least it would be if there were such a musical genre (note to self: it
may be time to get the old CW band back together). A group of dedicated
researchers who have spent the last 15 years freezing in Antarctica can
finally head someplace warm after
completely excavating the fossil remains of a 15-ton dinosaur
that looks an awful lot like what many people think the Loch Ness
monster looks like – really long neck, 40-foot-long thin body and tail,
four massive flippers and a mouth full of sharp teeth. Is it time for a
Nessie song? Would a skiffle tune be more appropriate? With bagpipes?
“The presence of this specimen, located less than 2.5
meters below the K/Pg boundary, indicates the persistence of
aristonectines at high latitudes short time before the mass extinction.”
That’s paleontology-speak for “We found a huge cousin of the
plesiosaurs near the South Pole latitudes that survived to the end of
the Cretaceous era before being wiped out by the Cretaceous–Paleogene
(K–Pg) extinction event (a massive comet or asteroid impact a long way
off in the Gulf of Mexico).”

According to their paper in
Crestaceous Research,
archeologists discovered the fossils in 1989 on Marambio Island off the
coast of Antarctica, but the sheer size and significance of the
skeleton and the freezing conditions on the island forced the team to
carefully remove it over an 18-year period culminating in 2017.
Paleontologist and study co-author José O’Gorman of the Museum of La
Plata summarized its importance:
“It is the largest elasmosaurid in the world.”
The elasmosaurids have the longest necks of the reptiles in the
family of plesiosaurs and this discovery indicates that they survived
right up until the big extinction rock hit Earth 66 million years ago,
meaning Antarctica was a pretty nice place to live at the time, with
plenty of warm water and food for 15 ton creatures. The question is,
could one of more of these elasmosaurids have somehow survived the K–Pg
extinction event or perhaps reappeared shortly after it and moved north
to Scotland?
“Even in Antarctica, there were lots of happy
elasmosaurs. It’s definitely an indication that toward the end of the
Cretaceous, [plesiosaurs] managed to expand their feeding repertoire.”
Anne Schulp, a vertebrate paleontologist at Utrecht University in the Netherlands, was not involved in the research but told the National Geographic
that the southern elasmosaurs known as the Aristonectes (meaning “best
swimmers”) were bigger than their northern cousins and size of the one
discovered on Marambio Island may indicate it’s a separate and new
genus. The mouth full of teeth may have helped it grow to record size …
the researchers believe the southern elasmosaurs fed more like whales –
opening their mouths wide to envelop fish-filled waters and then close
their mouths and expel the water, catching the fish in their teeth.
Unfortunately, that same feeding method is probably why they couldn’t
have survived until today – the K–Pg extinction event killed off almost
all of their food sources.
We probably won’t find Nessie in Antarctica and it’s unlikely the
Loch Ness Monster is a lost southern elasmosaur. However, that kind of
stuff never stopped country-western songwriters before. Grab a geetar
and a pen and come up with some new “monster” lyrics for this classic from
Urban Cowboy
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